• Mommy in the city

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    Carla Bianca V. Ravanes

    Carla Bianca V. Ravanes

    I AM proud to say that a stay-at-home mom raised me. My mom, who has enough charisma and street smarts to run for office gave up her then job at a reputable bank and John Robert Powers to raise my brother and I.

    And when I say raise, I don’t mean giving orders while sitting pretty all day. My mom, who early on, didn’t believe in household help, did everything herself and eventually taught us the power of chores and looking after ourselves at an early age. Growing up, I thought that was the norm and didn’t realize that my mom gave up a bright and glittering career in order to be there for my brother and I 24/7.

    I didn’t fully understand what she gave up until I became a “career” woman of my own. And while my Facebook feed is glittered with news of engagement and mommyhood from high school friends, I never quite found the obsessive need to have a ring on my finger or a tot on my arm.

    At this point in my life (and yes, I do believe my thinking will change in 20 or 30 years), I can’t imagine giving up this life of freedom for something more subdued.

    But people who have done it seem happy that they did, and looking at my mom and how she shines brightly when talking about her greatest treasures, I can’t help but realize that hey, there are many twenty somethings who have veered away from an entirely different path.

    One of them is my former journalism teacher in high school, Mico Dimanlig-Sadorra. Before settling down and taking on her new role as a full-time mommy and wife, she was a busy career girl earning her Master’s Degree in Language Education from the University of the Philippines while educating young minds for about five years.

    She had a one-track mind towards success but priorities changed when she married Bryan Sadorra and gave birth to Risen, who she considers a miracle baby. “Motherhood is a miracle for me. An OB told me before that I will never get pregnant so when Risen came, my husband and I were really surprised. This is one of the reasons on why we decided that I become a stay-at-home mom. We saw how important it is to have a parent at home,” she shares.

    When asked if she had difficulty leaving her previous life, she replies, “Yes, there were a lot of changes but I didn’t consider them as challenges but as merely adjustments. I think I see it this way because I married a little late. The time I had myself when I was single was pretty long so I had the opportunity to be adventurous, spontaneous, and free. I truly lived the life of a single woman.”

    Still, she also credits her supportive husband in making the transition easy for her. She says, “I love my life now. This is how I prayed for it to be [maybe even better]. I miss the classroom, yes, but being able to raise a boy is such a joy.”

    With motherhood, she said it was all about timing and enjoying the seasons of life. She also highlighted the importance of her “me” moments like still giving online English classes, meeting up with old friends, and date nights with her husband.

    It was a surprising look at a life that was away from boardrooms, deadlines, and the steep ladder of corporate success, yet it looked like a full vibrant life that was dictated by a title or a number. Mico’s choice and her happiness in doing so reflected why mom chose to give up propelling her own career in order to make room for ours.

    My mom’s own personal sacrifice is the foundation of every article I write, every title I possess, and every success, whether big or small, I experience and because of that I dedicate this article to her and all the stay at home moms everywhere. You may not hear it often, but the world is a better place because of what you all have given up.

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