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Okay, let’s get serious about love… I mean, about
the word love. It is difficult to find a word that has been more
abused and misused than that four letter word: LOVE.
We throw it around carelessly and
recklessly. “I love going to the movies! I love this and that.
And, oh yes, I love you too.”
The problem with the word love is
that, though it has clear definitions in the dictionary, it perhaps
the most misunderstood word on the planet. Different cultures use it
to mean things that are contrary to other cultures.
There are those who kill for
“love of God” while others hold to peaceful activities for love
of the same God. Or, is he the same God.
The man who is totally committed
to the well-being of his wife will tell you that he “loves” her.
But so does the guy who is simply looking to have sex with a woman.
He knows that the word love is magic, is music to the woman’s
ears. He knows full well that some women melt like butter on a hot
stove when they hear the word love. They quickly put more meaning
than is ever meant to be by the man who barely knows them.
They have seen too many movies
and have been drawn into the Hollywood way of seeing love. In the
movies, people fall in love and go riding off into the sunset in a
couple of hours. That is the magic of love. It is quick. It is
intense and it is sure to last… at least for a while.
I remember so many men who would
tell me that they “made love” to women who were prostitutes and
to women whom they merely took advantage of, but never loved. What,
in fact, they did was to “have sex” with these women. Love had
nothing to do with it. Still, they never hesitated to use the word
love.
Then again, some people use the
words love and sex interchangeably. In short, “love is sex and sex
is love.” They are synonyms for these people.
The problem lies in the confusion
that results from all this misuse of the word love. And there is so
much of this that we have become used to it and it hardly bothers us
at all.
Worse, our young people have
gotten used to it too and use the word irresponsibly and in a very
cavalier way. To the point where it no longer is descriptive of that
deep commitment and dedication that it was meant to mean.
One consequence of the confusion
that “love” causes is a lot of broken hearts and broken lives.
Those who were deceived by love learn to distrust it. As a result,
their chances of loving really and truly are lessened as they carry
the wounds of former betrayals of love into new relationships.
If you have problems about
drugs, alcohol and behavior/attitude call my office at 8206107 or
8251771 or e-mail me at gvcbuenca@vasia.com or write me at P.O. Box
2099 MCPO, Makati City.
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