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I am sure that a lot of our laborers had been so
tired clamoring for the credence of job security and elimination of
contractualization. As oppressive companies thrive, many exploited
people throw themselves on the streets over nothing. So why not just
drop everything and have fun? This is something even the
minimum-wage earners can afford! I watched this last week during
Labor Day. Check out this poster for more details:
Come one, come all, to the Grand
Mala-Carneyvale! This is the show that is bound to blow Las Vegas
away, for we have more attractions than Sin City. Full of sins, full
of fools! Sin-fool, indeed!
The Newest Freak Act (NFA). This
show features the bunch of gambler extraordinaire imported from Las
Bigas. These gamblers even have their imported defense bodyguard,
Condolence Rice. They will show you the magic of rice! Tickets are
only P18 something!
Also, come and see the famous
brothers Zomulo, Tenjamin and Edjun, otherwise known as the ZTE
Brood Band! Witness them battle with their drums and their heavy
metal guitars. They’ve been a phenomenon these past months, so you
must not dare miss this!
For more traditional circus
stunts, you can go to the small corner of the Monocyclist Jiggy
Pedal, who is able to ride his monocycle using just one pedal. And
he likes to scoop money from the awestruck crowd and then do his
disappearing act! Guaranteed satisfaction from screaming audience!
A one-night only, and never again
performance by the amazing world-class slapstick con-medy artist,
Joke Joke Violante! Twice the fun, twice the jokes, and twice the
price for your money! He might also do his disappearing act, so you
can’t afford to miss this one!
Another thing that you might not
ever see at all is The Marvelous Invisible Man, Hollow Garshee;
you will not see him, but you will certainly hear him! This show
includes a well-written series of acts and conversations that are
bound to blow you away. Don’t forget to get souvenirs in VCD and
DVD, pirated format.
We also have the cute and cuddly
animal shows, featuring the star kangaroo, Joey, trained by the
famous ring man and house emcee, Joe of the Venetian Hotel! Although
this adorable little Joey is under a tranquilizer after setting the
audience on fire and ruining the show for his kangaroo parents, he
will still have shows after a few months expulsion from the
Mala-Carneyvale. They call him and his parents, the Broad Banned in
the Mala-Carneyvale! Witness the broad band’s narrow escape. This
is surely one spectacular family drama!
Speaking of bands, for a more
laid-back ambiance, you can visit the lounge where the wonderful
songstress Sitti-E performs nightly with her band to render her
version of the NBN song, which stands for, No Billions Now? It’s
sad, but it is relaxing for sure!
We also have the amazing
decapitated ARMMS! These limbs walk on tightropes, dodge bullets,
knives and climb on automated polls! Or, poles…
Another mindless, decapitated act
is the Horror show of the Brainless, err; Headless Hoarse Man of the
Departed of Just East, Sir Raulo! He had tired to seize the throne
of his former ally, now nemesis in the slapstick comedy department,
Joke Joke Violante, with his equally headless wits!
Since all the shows are
exhilarating, you can treat yourselves to the refreshments at
Mala-Carneyvale! Try the famous ice cream men—Ben and Neri’s
sweets that will make your brain freeze and make you scream—with
fury. Be sure to moderate your greed, because sweets will do you no
good!
Going around Mala-Carneyvale on
foot can be exhausting! You might want to take the sham; I mean the
tram that drives around different studios and attraction sites. The
ever-efficient Northfail Tram will charge you a bit, but it will
also let you end up in the best and final destination in the
place—to the cliff, where the tracks end. But not before you have
witnessed the best attraction of all: The Glodzilla! Although the
cage has been on constant disaster renovation, we guarantee that you
can see this attraction before the Glodzilla is set free on the year
2010. Management decided to have a Garter Change before but then the
Glodzilla was unleashed and caused so much havoc. Legend has it that
before it became known as the fearsome Glodzilla, it was a tiny,
cuddly thing that turned wild after being abandoned by her Nanny
Perez.
Sounds fun huh? Tell me which
your favorite featured freak show is!
marylaine_viernes@manilatimes.net
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