As my child grows, so do the details of her observations. Last week she told me that there are three singles in her class. And I responded with, “Baby, all 17 of you are singles because all of you are still young and not married.” She corrected and said, “No Mom, I have 2 classmates whose Mummies also don’t have husbands. Like you.”
I explored further by asking how she knew. She said it’s her classmates that volunteered the information to her. Perhaps, they see that like the other kids’ parents, I am the only one picking up Gummy from school. It amazes me how some children closely watch almost everything and bring this information to each other, with no shame but just plain child-like curiosity.
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In the same week, Gummy asked me over dinner, “Mom, how come I don’t have a letter on my name?”
“What do you mean no letter? Your name is made up of letters,” I answered.
And then she explained through an example, “No Mom, for example, Camilo’s name is Camilo Marco C. Mendoza. He has C.’ Me, I’m only Amanda Lucia Carlos. No letter.”
That’s when I got it. Good thing I was on a funny and witty mood when she asked so I did not get so caught off guard.
“When Mummy marries, then you will have a middle name. You will be Amanda Lucia C. Pascual,” I playfully answered.
I always like joking to her that one day I will marry Piolo Pascual. He’s the only one she gets really kilig when she hears about. Of course this is just an example. She laughed, we both did but of course I was left astounded, yet again by my smart, six year-old.
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We are all aware of the parenting rule “Monkey see, monkey do.” It’s so easy for us adults to tell our children what to do, yet often times we do not do them. Or rather, we tell them what not to do but we do them out of habit.
For instance, Gummy usually catches me licking the tip of my finger to turn a page when reading a magazine or book. Then she goes, “Mom is that what you want me to do? Please don’t do it so I will not do it.”
It is funny how at times there’s a reversal of roles. But if you reflect more on the matter, what we do and say really have a tremendous impact in their lives. Our habits, shape theirs.
May this instance always remind us that our children are always watching. And may we be mindful of our little quirks that our kids may be picking up. More often than not, it’s us parents who need to change a lot… because our children will become who we are today.
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One particular Social Studies seatwork in school caught my attention. The activity was about checking Yes or No with the given statements. One number spoke about pride: I should be proud of how I look. My daughter’s answer was “no.”
Puzzled, I asked her why and she responded, “Mom remember you told me being proud is bad. I don’t want to be ‘mayabang’ because I am beautiful.”
I was blown away by her explanation. I am very sure I have taught her humility, but the other positive meaning of pride (self-esteem, being satisfied), I have not discussed with her yet.
I really find it amusing how children are very observant and thoughtful. Also how they take our word for everything.