A week into my daughter’s sixth birthday (where did time really go?), spare this momma a little nostalgia and journey with her as she looks back at life as a single parent for six years and counting …
It was not easy. But it had always been manageable. I believe there is absolutely nothing in life you cannot handle if you choose to—especially if you have a strong reason to press forward.
Over the course of the past 312 weeks since I made the choice to be a solo parent (it must be an active choice for it to work successfully and healthily), the journey has been a mix of ups and downs but more highs than anything. A constant tugging between working on weekends or staying in and snuggling and cuddling.
Filled with sleepless nights, [day]dreams and tears alike but more love above all else. The ride has been an adventurous one, full of turns and surprises—plans of vacation, of the future—all submitted and subject to the Mighty Hand of God, who never disappoint and always delivers beyond what I have asked or even had in my head.
Single mothers are not always strong. We start out in agony and sorrow. Broken and shattered. Bewildered and clueless where to begin. Plain lost. But then from nothing and nowhere we suddenly emerge with unprecedented strength. As soon as the weight of the responsibility that is bigger than our predicament dawns on us and at the same time we receive grace and wisdom from Above, we pick up the pace and continue the race with renewed endurance.
I truly believe that it is only the hand of our God, who is close to the lost, the last and the least that sustains Single SuperWoMoms. The Supplier and Sustainer of super strength we need.
Us single mothers are unstoppable. We are conquerors. Overcomers. For single mothers, things always work out for us (you know mostly except for that one person to complete the tree). The pain as fuel, the lack an incentive. I believe we are gifted with high adversity quotient (AQ) – nothing can be harder to stop us nor slow us down. We do not start strong but we emerge stronger than we can ever imagine (Philippians 4:13).
Single mothers never give up. We cannot afford to. Life and the quality of it depend on us, long before it was even brought into this world. Single mothers are fighters. We protect what is ours, what we have and what we earn. The only downside perhaps is that work is double and yet attendance is always solo.
There is so much to do but so little time, as the cliche goes. But the rewards —both here and heaven are immeasurable. And the result: an independent, level-headed, emotionally-balanced, respectful, appreciative, loving, simple, God-fearing child, who knows the value of work. They are first-hand witnesses to how much work is put into putting food on the table and gifts under the Christmas tree.
Single mothers work hard to teach their children that nothing comes easy in this world. They are taught the value and appreciation of things by showing them how hard we must work to get those for them. To us, nothing must be taken for granted. Every minute, every opportunity counts. Whether it is to work or to spend time.
Gummy my child, I have experienced both: to have and to lack; to enjoy a lavish vacation and shop endlessly as well as enjoy a nice walk in the park and lie down in the grass. The extravagance I can go to and the simplicity of just being with you. You are God’s greatest gift to me. I can move mountains for you, my child. I can do everything and overcome anything for you. And yet those tiny lips and short arms are all I need after a tough battle—a single peck on the cheek and a warm tight hug after a long consuming day remove all aches away!
Being a strong single mom, I am grateful to be anchored and planted in a vine that is truly the Source of life, of knowledge, wisdom, blessings, opportunities and strength. Apart from which I could not have done anything. I never and could not afford to take any credit for the wonderful person you are becoming, my child.
This is all by God’s abounding amazing grace alone. We have been blessed, provided for, protected and favored, my child.
Send your birthday greetings to Gummy via email at firstname.lastname@example.org or follow her Instagram at @gummybites7